Last Updated on: 12th July 2023, 02:19 pm
Now imagine and wipe a tear from your eye. Last year Gay Christmas was canceled. The pandemic, which was due to happen in May 2020, forced the 65th Eurovision 2021 Song Contest to leave our screens and a microwave meal with clips from previous years was our consolation.
Not so this year! Eurovision 2021 is back and arguably better than ever. Which artists should you see in Rotterdam with a two-year budget because they are really good (answer: not much)?
And who should you watch to live a strange Dutch fever dream?
Either way, there will be love, love, peace, peace – so check it out this Saturday night!
Iceland – Daði & Gagnamagnið – “10 years”
Look, they should (and should have) won last year. They were stolen by Covid in 2020 and this year too! They are not competing live because one of their groups tested positive. But that shouldn’t stop you from loving her so much: “10 years” is almost as big as “Think about things“.
And of course, they don’t have that much ‘I hate my life’ mood anymore, but a feel-good factor, a catchy melody, and questionable dances secure their place in the top 5. These fresh outfits and keytars also go a long way. My favorite.
Malta – Destiny – ‘Je me Casse’
I know what you are thinking, reader. Wait for a second, isn’t it Destiny Chukunyere, famous 2015 Eurovision Junior Song Contest winner, BGT 2017 season finalist in 6th place, and season two winner of the Maltese version of The X Factor?
And of course, you are right, you are an absolute/fraudulent Wikipedia song contest nerd (rings if necessary). Destiny channels her inner Lizzo or Netta, depending on her cynicism and brings out a poppy melody that is about empowering women. The lyrics include “Hell, no, I’m not your sweetheart” and “Yes, I’m too good to be true”.
Similar songs were well received in 2018 (Israel) and 2019 (North Macedonia). So expect this to get a high score. Any idea what ‘I’m breaking’ actually means? Neither do I. Excuse my French.
Also Read: Eurovision Song Contest 2021 is Currently The Most Important Competition In The World
Switzerland – Gjon’s tears – “Tout L’univers”
Crunchy ballad, terrible outfit, and really decent singing – what more could you want?
If Malta channels Israel in 2018, it will be the winner of the Dutch “Arcade” anywhere in 2019 – without a piano. With a Wild Tetris-inspired set and a high note or two, it’s one to watch out for, if only for the sake of the damage when he can’t beat those notes at night.
There is also a strange video clip of a car accident that I still don’t fully understand. Any idea would be greatly appreciated.
Ukraine – Go_A – “Shum”
The Ukrainian contribution “Dancing Lasha Tumbai” from 2007 had a child with a Farming Simulator and brought him to Piers Gav. Go_A’s hypnotic EDM entry mixes up a traditional Ukrainian spring ritual into something that wouldn’t sound out of place at a warehouse rave in East London. Rah, where is my зеленесенькі?
The staging is forest, the dancing is wild and Go_A holds up a fantastic commitment to say that the Ukrainian has “sown” at least seventy-five times. Getting out of nowhere in the semi-finals could lead to a foiled win – the second in five years.
Serbia – Hurricane – “Loco Loco”
I have nothing to say to them but I put a 3lb bet for no reason other than it might be fun. If they win I will make £1200.
In fact, a guitar that I have a lot to say: it’s the most talented band I’ve seen in the Eurovision Song Contest. It’s the best song ever, brilliant choreography, fantastic setting. Please vote for her. Please vote for my financial security if nothing else.
Italy – Måneskin – “Zitti e buoni”
Okay, now it’s the right Eurovision 2021: Royal Blood with Dolmio flavor. Freshly won the same Italian singing competition that Andrea Bocelli organized years ago.
This rock band, whose members are known by the name ‘Ethan Torchio’, will set your bar on fire. College – they sound really good, with a solid rock vibe and cool lyrics, although I have no idea what they’re really saying. If it’s a surprise, let it be.
If Italy wins here, it will be the first time since 1990. Still, I think I ordered Zitti e buoni from Franco Manca last night.
San Marino – Senhit feat. Flo Rida – “Adrenalina”
Yes, you read that right. Florida. As in “Blow My Whistle,” “The Club Can’t Treat Me Right Now” Flo Rida. Yes, the “Apple Bottom Jeans (jeans), the boots with the fur” Flo Rida.
Why you might ask, does Grammy-nominated international pop star Flo Rida work with a country of fewer than 35,000 people?
Who knows. But that’s classic Eurovision. The song also pops. Listen. Enjoy it. And look forward to Jason Derulo taking on North Macedonia next year.
James Newman – Embers – United Kingdom
My apologies to my Spotify subscribers – I only literally listened to it, and the UK entry left so little impact on my sleek, unarmored brain that I had to listen to it again. Look, it’s not as bad as Electro Velvet or Joe and Jake, but it’s not Blue or Lucie Jones. Hell, it’s not even Molly.
Understanding all of this will also help you understand that the UK could have developed a Covid vaccine to end the pandemic completely and we still wouldn’t make it to the left of the rankings.
By the end of “Embers,” you’re almost hoping there was a stage invasion. Expect it to play in addition to a Jet2holidays commercial by the end of the year.
France – Barbara Pravi – “Voila”
I didn’t do any French after GCSE, so all I can say about the lyrics is that it has something to do with Barbara Pravi and has a lot to say. The direction is really cool because there aren’t any and Pravi can certainly sing. It could, god help us all, be a really good song so I’m not sure what it does at Eurovision.
At this point, France is one of the favorites to win, but we all know how well it always goes (just watch a video about Sweden’s poor participation in 2019, NOT as a winner). But that’s fine, and the jury likely voted on the lockdown. Say “voila” to the trophy?
